:: mount faber... ::

today, after 7 years, i went up to mount faber alone... it has changed so much, as compared with the 1st time i were dere when i was 8yo, on a jogging session with my uncle and auntie. even the view from the top has changed, more and more green patches been taken away to make rm for bricks and concretes... to me, the best timings to visit mount faber is between 6pm-8pm... at 6+pm, where the sun is slowly setting off, the view is coated with golden rays and u can get to see further than under a hot sun... at 7+pm, where the moon fully took over the sky, all the lights and lamps seem to be like shiny diamonds spread across our land... on a windy weather, mount faber is a very gd place to linger ard too, the sounds of the gentle wind smoothes the soul and mind...

however, it is the beauty of mount faber, magnifies the imperfection within me...yup, i felt alonely... it is the place where i left most of my sad memories and tears during my secondary sch period... it's been so long, so i guess no point to mention them in my blog, else will flood my whole blog... each time when i went up dere, the degree of sadness became more and more intense... it's not dat i cant forgive dat wat has happened to me, but it's mainly i cant forget them, my precious memories... maybe dat is why, i did not want to go up dere after so long... another likely reason is my pace in life doubles up when i entered poly, where my social life expands...

when i went up dere today, all my past memories rushes into my mind and nearly choked my senses... similiarly, my purpose to go up dere is to leave some memories but not to cry... it's not dat i dun wan to, it's i cant... after i sorted out my emotions, i stroll all the way without turning my head back at all... till next time, my dearest mount faber... hopefully, i wun go dere alone ever again so soon...

when i reached home, dinner was just ready. ha... perfect timing, as wat i thought... as i opened the rice cooker, the steam revealed the rice... i stood dere motionless for a few sec... i saw a pile of leftover rice stacked on top of the freshly cooked rice... a sad feeling creeps into my heart, as a smile appeared on my face and my eyes narrow in... it's been so long and far, yet so familiar to me... this is the feeling of home i thought... wat pinches my heart more is i missed both my grandmothers. coz only with them ard, i would get to see leftover rice being mixed with freshly steamed rice together in the rice cooker... poly, army and staying in hostel has taken this scene away from my life for so long... ha... yup, i can get moved by small things like this quite easily... if u ever catch me, stood motionless for a few sec... very likely, something muz haf reminded me of my past, dat i missed so much...

+ BL updated @ 12:02 AM

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